I watched the movie Up in the Air. Ahhh, relationships: there’s Clooney’s character who has no expectations about anything because he doesn’t ever want to be married. Then there’s the young, female idealist who wants someone who “fits the bill” – her laundry list of who he should be. And there’s the 34 year old woman who says she is like Clooney, only with a vagina. She enjoys spontaneity and sewing her wild oats. But when he shows up at her house, not knowing she is married and has kids, she becomes very protective of her “real life.”
I wonder, as women are we biologically programmed to crave stability like the two women in this movie? Perhaps because we are the child-bearers and care-takers? While I consider myself a free-spirit and enjoy living in the moment without loading things up with expectations of how it “should be,” I still get flashes of insecurity when I’m dating someone and I don’t know where he is or why he doesn’t answer my call. Does he think about me when I’m not around? Does he miss my company? Or does he just want to bone me?Maybe this is all very fleeting. Maybe he will up and disappear.
So what’s the happy medium? How do we find a balance between living in the moment without a ton of baggage and feeling secure that it will last or at least that we will be OK? Does a balance between these two even exist?
So I asked my good friend Jim Beam. I said, “Jimmy, why does shit suck so bad?” To which he replied, “Kid, lemme tell you somethin. Life is never static. You just have to get comfortable knowing nothing ever stays the same. Enjoy the connections you make…
Don’t want to wait ’til you know me better…let’s just be glad for this time together…life’s such a treat and it’s time you taste it…there ain’t a reason on earth to waste it…Lick it up, liiick it up, Ooooh ooh oh! It’s only right now…”
God I love Jimmy.
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